Brendan E. Byrnes
Brendan E. Byrnes, 61, of Binghamton, passed away at his home on October24, 2022, as a result of metastatic prostate cancer first diagnosed in 2018.
Brendan was born on October 29, 1960. He was the fourth son of the late Edward (Tony) and Evelyn Byrnes. Brendan is survived by his wife, Hollie Levine, his beloved children Aidan, Brigid, Phoebe (Matt Meier) and Brendan, as well as by his stepdaughter, Elana. He is survived by the lights of his life, his grandchildren Cameron Byrnes and Madison Meier. Brendan is also survived by his brothers Kevin (Martina), Patrick (Soria), Shawn (Rose) and Edmund, by several nieces and nephews and by many Byrnes and Corkery cousins. In addition, he is survived by his Primanis “sisters,” Sigrid, Olivia, and Yvonne. He is also survived by his sisters-in-law, Debra Harosh and Natalie Shatkin.
Brendan grew up on Binghamton’s East Side and was a member of the North High Class of 1978. Brendan graduated from Binghamton University with a BA in English, a Masters in English and a Masters in Education. Brendan shared his deep, abiding love for literature and writing with thousands of students in Broome County. He taught English for over thirty years in three districts: Seton Catholic Central, Vestal and Binghamton. He also taught Upward Bound students during the summer for over two decades.
Brendan’s children and grandchildren were his greatest joys and the recipients of his boundless love. He was proud of the achievements of his children and was always there for them, in good times and in times of struggle. He appreciated each of his children for his and her individuality. He mastered the art of selflessly supporting them without imposing his will on them. He enjoyed learning about everything they were involved in. He relished spending time with them and never failed to tell each of them how much he loved them. Brendan loved his role of Papa to Cameron and to Madison. He instilled in his children and grandchildren his values of social justice, honesty, responsibility, kindness and lifelong learning.
Brendan and Hollie met in June 2013 and married that November. Their relationship was one of deep affection, shared values, trust and support. This partnership fulfilled Brendan’s lifelong search for the love that he deserved so very much. With Hollie, he finally got to live the life he was meant to live with the person he was meant to be with. Whether it was dancing to music in the kitchen, enjoying Shabbat dinner, taking daily walks together on the Westside or traveling the world, Hollie brought him great joy. He and Hollie shared a meaningful life of faith, commitment and true love.
Brendan loved to read well-written literature, poetry, prose, essays and non-fiction. If he was sitting down, he was reading or doing a crossword puzzle. He was a true wordsmith in every sense of the word. Brendan routinely connected life, literature and film to his favorite, beloved Shakespearean works. Intellectually curious, Brendan was a brilliant man with a life-long interest in learning something about everything.
Well-tended gardens delighted him and he spent many hours lovingly caring for his own flower gardens. Brendan also loved music and was for many years a chorister in the Tri-Cities Opera. He was a devoted theater goer and film lover. He acted in many local productions and directed plays at Seton Catholic Central and also Vestal High School. Brendan loved making connections with his students and others in his life. It was virtually impossible for him to go anywhere in Broome County without meeting up with a former student, co-worker, neighbor or friend. Brendan loved to hear people’s stories and to share his stories with others. He made friends easily as he possessed an ability to connect with people of all backgrounds.
Brendan was deeply committed to social justice. One of Brendan’s most often repeated sayings was that we needed to “Tax the Rich!” Brendan worked this past year with a support circle for an Afghan refugee family. Brendan also infused his teaching with analyses of race, class and gender. He possessed a unique ability to connect with others of all ages and backgrounds and his door was always open to everyone.
In fact, many of his former students stayed in contact with him for years or even decades. Consistent with the indelible impact Brendan made on the lives of his former students, many of them reached out to Brendan after learning about diagnosis. Their support meant the world to Brendan. He is survived by thousands of these students, one in particular, “adopted son” Junior Time.
After a years-long search for a spiritual home, Brendan converted to Reform Judaism in 2017. Brendan found great fulfillment, meaning, peace and joy in becoming a Jew. He immersed himself in studying Judaism and in practicing the customs and rituals of the faith. An active member of the Jewish community, he served on the Federation Board. His soul’s desire to be recognized as fully Jewish by all sectors of the Jewish community culminated in an Orthodox conversion on August 23, 2022. Brendan, with the support of Hollie and the guidance of his friends at Chabad of Binghamton, established a kosher home and became Sabbath observant.
Brendan’s family is very grateful to the support given to him, and to us, by so many people during his illness. Foremost among them are his spiritual rocks, Rabbi Barbara Goldman-Wartell and Rabbi Aaron and Rivky Slonim as well as Rabbis Zev Silber and Geoffrey Brown. The family thanks his dear friends Sasha and Paul; Janine; Nancy and Jamie; Phyllis; Julie; Arieh and Rhonda; Merryl; Roz; Claudia and Chris; Chuck; Charlie; Justin; neighbors Karl and Rose and so many, many more. Brendan truly felt surrounded by love and caring during his illness.
Brendan was fortunate to have received terrific medical care. We thank his longtime doctor, Keith Nichols, as well as his doctors at Memorial Sloan Kettering, Dr. Chung-han Lee and Dr. Shelly Latte Naor, Dr. Nick Liu of Upstate Urology at UHS and the staff at Broome Oncology and Lourdes Hospice for all of their efforts in caring for Brendan.
Finally, Brendan was fortunate to have been in psychotherapy with Jack Sperling for many years. Brendan and his entire family are grateful to Jack for his attentive, loving care. Brendan survived a trauma-filled childhood and wouldn’t have been the man he was without Jack’s exemplary care.
In the words of William Shakespeare in Hamlet:
Thou know’st tis common.
All that lives must die,
Passing through nature to eternity.
The family will receive friends at Temple Concord, 9 Riverside Dr. Binghamton on October 25, 2022, from 9:00 a.m. to 10:30 a.m. Funeral services will be held at Temple Concord immediately thereafter. The family requests everyone wear masks at the visitation and service. An Orthodox graveside service and burial will be at Westlawn cemetery, Burbank Avenue, Johnson City immediately following the services at Temple Concord.
The funeral service will be on zoom:
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/87161095565?pwd=dDFQd0RUVVR6TlpqT3lIaFMzMVBKQT09
Meeting code 871 6109 5565
Passcode 969152
Hollie and the family will be sitting shiva the family residence, from Tuesday evening Friday afternoon, 2-4pm and 7-9pm and Saturday evening 7-9pm and Sunday 4-6pm and 7-9pm. Shiva minyan services will be a 7:30pm Tuesday-Thursday evenings and Saturday through Sunday evening.All are welcome. An egalitarian prayer service will be held daily.
PLEASE DO NOT BRING NON-KOSHER FOOD OR DRINK TO THE HOME.
In keeping with Jewish tradition, PLEASE DO NOT SEND FLOWERS. Instead, memorial donations may be made to the charity of your choice. Even more importantly, please honor Brendan’s commitment to social justice by working to create a more just society.
Now, the most important final writing assignment for Mr. Byrnes: please write a memory of him and share it with his family by emailing it to [emailprotected] or mailing it to the family residence. It would mean a lot to his family to see the ways in which he has left a lasting legacy with those whose lives he enriched.
To forward condolences please visit www.demunn.com. Arrangements for the family are directed by the DeMunn Funeral Home.
